Pickett: The Roots of American Self-Loathing

Musings and comments of a like minded writer...

By Joseph Pickett - The Washington Times

If it were possible to seize a phrase of the English language by the vowels, drag it behind the barn and blast it center mass with old Dad's 12 gauge, I would cheerfully nominate the vile "Why do they hate us?"

This sick question, along the lines of asking a bloodied, violated woman "Why did he rape you?", has been posed approximately 417,541,520 times since Sept. 11, 2001 by a gaggle of allegedly intelligent American self-loathers who fancy themselves as good world citizens. I reluctantly suspect them of intelligence because most who mouth this phrase have all the normal trappings of the brainy class.

For example, garden-variety self-loathers find more fault with America than with butchers in the Middle East who treat their people worse than we treat body lice. The self-loathers respect the opinion of the thugocratic United Nations, that delightful unelected international body, chockablock with murderous tyrants, dictators, and slightly more palatable EU socialists. Self-loathers have flawless teeth whitened by fluoridated water, gilded diplomas hanging elegantly on the pastel walls of their tastefully decorated homes, the latest New York Times sheathed in recycled blue bags and plopped in their smooth concrete driveways, environmentally-conscious vehicles sitting in their 2.5 car garages, and clean fingernails. Self-loathers live lovely and comfortable lives, enough so that they have the heretofore unimagined luxury of denigrating the very country whose Constitution, values, and economic system has given them the unprecedented opportunity to bask in a luxurious existence where the most dire question is not where to find a protein source or potable water today, but which Ivy League school to send Junior to 12 years hence? Or, more to the point, why do bloodthirsty Muslim terrorists want to turn us into bloody vapor with C-4 and nails instead of give us a tender group hug?

According to the self-loathers, everyone in their Sunday knitting circles is debating the roots of misguided, warped Muslims' unfortunate tendency to blow up things with infidels in them. And they mean everyone they know - their 82 year-old mothers, brothers, friends, street mimes, dock workers, heck, everyone except the 16 year-old pimply bag boy at Safeway, who undoubtedly would be asking 'Like, you know, why do they hate us, dude?' if government education had taught him to read at the 8th grade level at which most newspapers are written.

The answer, according to self-loathers? "Fear, envy, frustration, poverty, cultural conflict." Now that's par-for-the-course, boilerplate pabulum from the self-loathing class. Strictly bush league stuff. But hold on. I have also read other 'root causes' recently that self-loathers blame for our troubles. Ready? They also blame:

American tourists, who are, "overloud, overweight, over here...who misbehave without even knowing they are causing offense." That's right, my fellow world travelers! The reason that doll-faced 4 year-old non-Muslim tots are disemboweled each day by Islamofascists is because - drum roll please! - loud, obese American tourists are contributing American dollars to the economies of Egypt, Turkey, and Indonesia! Of course! Why didn't I think of that? Recall the tourists ASAP. (Not so fast - I know those old ladies are hard on the eyes, but John, these economic basket cases can use all the greenbacks they can get.) Free tip to travelers: If you are going abroad, remember to speak in hushed tones and wear a potato sack.

American consumers, who "use things up." From having the audacity to wash our Pontiacs with precious fluids and not saying a prayer of thanks beforehand, to driving those gas-gobbling SUVs to the grocery store, to taking 15 minute showers, ordinary Americans are causing genocide just by how they go about their daily lives! Imagine, the next time you daydream in the shower about Laurie Dhue, boom. Another innocent life snuffed out in Sudan! Free tip to consumers: Even though Muslim nations have practically self-immolated with their horrific human rights records, the enslavement of half their populations, and their totalitarian economies, forget about all that. Save a life. Cut those showers short, and walk to work. Don't work hard when you get there, either.

American oil consumers. Those pesky consumers again, doggone it! Apparently, in his trips to the Middle East, John can't explain how Americans manage to use so much oil. Free tip to drivers: If someone asks you this, point out that the United States produces 25 percent of the world's stuff and has about 5 percent of the world's population. If you suspect the person who asks you could be a terrorist though, just nod and make sympathetic noises.

American entertainment. A lot of our worst culture - action movies, soft porn, reality TV, Friends (gag) - is gobbled up eagerly by audiences abroad. I would blame human nature in general for this one, but what the heck, blame Hollywood. Self-loathers blame everyone else in America, so why not overpaid actors and directors? Free tip to Hollywood: Start exporting documentaries on frolicking beavers, but for God's sake, make sure the beavers look unhappy and aren't fornicating.

These original answers to "Why do they hate us?" should win the author a life achievement award for brazen self-hatred and a free year of psychoanalysis. But, really, it's just more of the same bilge this crowd has been spouting since 9/11. Like all the self-loathers' explanations for terrorist actions, each of them holds Americans personally responsible for the unfriendly feelings that others harbor against us. Why? If a Muslim kills me because I have a nicer house than he does, is it his fault or mine? Reverse the situation. If I kill a Saudi national on the streets of D.C. because he drives a nicer car than I do, is it his fault? Or mine? If I don't like the turban Mohammed is wearing on the subway platform and I push him in front of a train, is his religion to blame? Or am I? If peasants in Saudi Arabia relieve themselves in holes in the ground and have no drinkable water while their leaders live in golden palaces, is it my fault? Or the Saudi government's fault? Are the successes (and excesses) of successful nations responsible for the violent actions of others?

The self-loathers, of course, would answer it's my fault when I do something bad, and also my fault when a Muslim is offended by something I do and does something bad in response, as well. This highlights the breathtaking arrogance at the foundation of their specious arguments. The self-loathers are assuming that Muslims can't be held to the West's own elevated standards. The poor Muslims are more like wild animals, whose savagery should not be provoked by our foolishness. When we do provoke them, the consequences are entirely our fault. This isn't simply arrogance. It's moral racism. But through it all, the self-loathers feel good about themselves, which is what the game is all about anyway.

Despite the self-indulgent, arrogant navel-gazing by the self-loathers who always blame America, some free-thinking Americans believe that America isn't the problem and Muslims aren't primitive savages who can't help themselves. Rather, if the world's Muslim peoples could prosper under semi-modern governments (say, 19th century?) that embrace democracy, freedom, free markets, secularism, and human rights, terrorism would wither away. Some of us think that the heart of the terrorist problem rests with the so-called 'governments' that run Muslim nations, what people in less polite circles refer to as 'repressive Third World dictatorial fascist states with GDPs less than Des Moines' that use the USA and Israel as scapegoats to explain their miserably failed societies.' After all, when you think of an Islamic nation success story, a real economic powerhouse and a beacon of freedom and religious tolerance, one thinks of.....Saudi Arabia? Egypt? Qatar? Says a lot, doesn't it?
Dec. 8, 2002
J.M.P.

The Wonder Years - Thank God I Missed Them
1970 wasn't exactly a high water mark in the history of the Republic. It was the year of Apollo 13, the Vietnam War was blowing up nicely in our faces, and the first Earth Day took place in May of that year (a seminal event in the lives of some, no doubt). Plus, knee-capping hothead Tonya Harding came into the world on November 12, 1970, and so did I. No, definitely not a perfect year by any stretch.

Still, I could have done a heck of a lot worse than to be born in 1970. I could have been born a year earlier. I could have been born in the 1960s. For most of my adult life, I have had to bear people with gray ponytails as they wax orgasmic about the 60s. All that free love, cheerful embracing of communist murder states, those heady 'Hanoi Jane' years, and living in smelly VWs sound tempting, I grant you, but I thank my maker that I missed out. You see, after years of careful observation and gathering facts from CNN, the New York Times, and Maureen Dowd columns, I have reached this highly scientific conclusion: A hair-raising number of people who 'came of age' in the 1960s are out of their friggin' minds.

My parents were already adults with adult responsibilities in the mid-60s, and they taught me that I'm supposed to respect my elders. But when a sizable group of people in their 40s and 50s act like their heads are full of boiled oatmeal, sorry, I have to speak up.

They are whacked, my friends. Toys in the attic. Their brains went on a permanent Magical Mystery Tour around 1968 and were never heard from again. They make Michael Jackson look well-adjusted (who just so happens to have come of age in - the 1960s). Many of these people are 20 years+ older than I am, and I wouldn't trust them to water my petunias for the weekend. People of that age generally run the United States Congress today, which explains a lot.

I'm not sure what happened to these folks (I will refer to them as 'the brain dead' or TBD, from here on out). I was but a thought in my parents' minds when CCR was in their hey-day, so I can only speculate what caused the brain development of TBD to cease in mid-to-late adolescence. Drugs? Maybe, but I did pot in 1988-89, and today I don't view the United States and Iraq as moral equivalents, or the thugocratic UN as a beacon of democratic light. What's TBD's excuse? Rebellion? I have passing familiarity with the tendency to oppose parental influence during adolescence. The infamous gallon-of-cheap-red-wine incident circa 1988 comes to mind. But I settled into relatively normal adulthood after college when the mortgage and car payments began to kick in. Why are TBD, who also are saddled with adult responsibilities now, so mindlessly obtuse when it comes to the defense of our nation and countless other issues? A few examples in the arena of public policy when the empty craniums of TBD are embarrassingly on display:

The 2nd Amendment - According to TBD, only government militias have the right to bear arms (And if a killer is breaking down your door? Dissuade him with race and gender-neutral harsh language and call 911). Funny, when I was in high school, we learned that the young United States had broken from the tyrannical Crown by killing people and breaking things with arms (not with words and peace treaties, Mr. Carter, or by breaking bread with tyrants, for that matter). So the Founding Fathers responded by guaranteeing the right to bear arms to...the government? Note to the brain dead: Please write 1,000 times on the nearest writing surface: All rights under the Constitution are vested in individuals by God.

Iraq - TBD give many reasons why we shouldn't take out the murderous thug Saddam Hussein. The US didn't do anything about him before (The difference: 9/11), we gave him some of his current weapons during the Iran-Iraq war (The difference: 9/11), his tendency to torture dissidents, rip out tongues, employ professional rapists didn't bother us before (The difference: 9/11), why don't we hit Iran and N. Korea as well (one at a time, fellas. And remember the difference: 9/11). Somehow, the vicious murder of 3,000 innocent Americans on a sunny late summer day, which caused the largest shift in US foreign policy since World War II, doesn't seem to have registered with TBD. Were they watching PBS that day?

After terrorist savages ran planes into buildings on 9/11, I thought for awhile that TBD would be jolted into reality, but no. The other day when I was leaving the gym, I saw a graying 50ish man climb into his Ford Focus. On the rear was this bumper sticker - "Stop Terrorism. Stop Bush." Two things are certain in this life: My Cleveland Browns will never appear in the Super Bowl, and TBD will always be just that.
J.M.P.

Knocking Themselves Out
I once saw a kid on the playground whose face was a bloody mess. He had been running like hell on the playground and not watching where he was going. He ran full tilt into a brick wall headfirst. He survived, but I think he rode the short bus after that day.

The Democrats are like that. Since the 2002 elections, they've been concentrating so hard looking back on why they lost control of Congress, they aren't looking out for those sturdy brick walls in front of them. They're going to knock some teeth loose if they keep this up. Picking Nancy Pelosi to be minority leader in the House is one example. The Democratic caucus has to be pretty woozy to pick a San Franciso Marxist like Nancy as the 'new' face of the party. I am breathless in anticipation for her fresh ideas - the Soviet Union already tried bread lines and five-year plans. Postscript: They didn't work, and these days, former Warsaw Pact nations are clamoring to join NATO.

Another is Tom Daschle's bizarre news conference recently when he implied that criticism of him on the Rush Limbaugh radio program had increased the threats against Daschle's family. Any hard evidence backing this slanderous accusation wasn't disclosed.

The New York Times reports Daschle as saying, "What happens when Rush Limbaugh attacks those of us in public life is that people aren't satisfied just to listen," Mr. Daschle said. "They want to act because they get emotionally invested. And so, you know, the threats to those of us in public life go up dramatically...that's very disconcerting."

The Times continues, "If entertainment becomes so much a part of politics," he said, "and if that entertainment drives an emotional movement in this country....that troubles me about where politics in America is going."

More: "...we think, [regarding terrorism] how can religious fundamentalism become so violent? Well, it's that same shrill rhetoric, it's that same shrill power that motivates. Somebody says something, and then it becomes a little more shrill the next time... and pretty soon it's a foment that becomes physical in addition to just verbal. And that's happening in this country."

Let's digest this, shall we, class? Tom Daschle is implying that:

A hugely popular mainstream conservative (Want proof? Limbaugh has a contract worth about $25 million and 21 million listeners) is inciting people to violence by having the nerve discuss news topics and analyze political stories of the day.

Limbaugh's listeners are robotic barbarians who need only to have their violent tendencies channeled and directed for them to be transformed into frothing criminals (that is, Limbaugh exercising his 1st Amendment rights causes people to do bad things, and it's Limbaugh's fault when they do).

Limbaugh exercising his right to free speech and our hearing his words is akin to militant Islamofascists, who think Jews are apes, telling their followers to kill the infidel.

Hmmm. One wonders, is an assault on a highly popular media personality and slandering the intelligence of a sizable chunk of the electorate a standard play in the Democratic Party primer when they come up short on Election Day? Is this their winning strategy to get back in the voters' good graces? This is a most curious political strategy. What's next? Persuade men to vote for higher taxes by kneeing them in the groin? Ask women to support abortion by stabbing them in the uterus? I would think they would want to try something more basic, such as detail their policy positions and explain why Americans should support them. Well, that's why Terry Mac and James Carville get the big bucks. They must know something I don't.

Still, I wonder if Daschle is listening to the same show I am. Here's a quote from Limbaugh's show recently: "Guess who John F. Kerry is getting presidential candidacy advice from, ladies and gentlemen? None other than The Loser, Michael S. Dukakis. I don't think God is generous enough to give us another liberal Massachusetts Democrat to run against."

What barbarism. What moral depravity. Now put the knives back in the drawer, right-wingers. Sit back in your Lazy-Boy, pop another beer, and please don't kick the dog. No threats or violence, okay?

What I don't understand is why is Daschle only concerned with what is coming from right-wing radio. If he is so concerned about shrill rhetoric that incites violence, he should examine what comes from people on his side of the aisle. How about two years ago when CBS ran a shot of Gov. George Bush at the GOP convention with a caption underneath that said "Snipers Wanted"? What a laugh riot - my sides are splitting - and even more amusing after the recent sniper rampage in the D.C. area. How about when Alec Baldwin suggested that Rep. Henry Hyde and his family should be stoned to death? Pretty harsh, but at least Baldwin was culturally inclusive of Islam in his choice of death sentence for Hyde and his loved ones. What about the DNC ad last month of Bush pushing an old-timer in a wheelchair off a cliff? Did Daschle ask the NAACP to pull its TV ad in 2000 that basically accused Bush of lynching a black man in Jasper, Texas? Amusing episodes, all.

Perhaps Sen. Daschle really believes that Rush Limbaugh reading Wall Street Journal op-eds on the air and commenting on them causes people to beat their wives and attack politicians with sharp instruments. It appears to the casual observer, however, that he is sniveling and whining after a hard day at the ballot box, and also that his path to future victory is to silence the people who disagree with him. One also wonders if this is the beginning of a sinister campaign to limit the freedoms of talk radio with the new 'campaign finance reform laws' (also known as a blatant violation of the 1st Amendment). Remember how Clinton tied the right-wing to Timothy McVeigh? This isn't just poor sportsmanship. It's un-American.

As a Republican, if Daschle and his cohorts in the Democratic Party want to keep bashing their skulls like this, I'll be happy to keep pointing them in the direction of the nearest brick wall on which to bloody themselves. I think their next target should be apple pie - I heard somewhere that eating it causes racism and low self-esteem in children of color.

Federal Observer contributor Joseph Pickett is a full-time writer and editor in Alexandria Va. His work has appeared most recently in The Washington Times and CommonConservative.com. We invite you to visit his website.

Joseph M. Pickett
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